"Don't be alarmed, I'm a dogter"

And all this time we just thought they were looking for love.

From the BBC.

Easy to pick-up Hard to hold onto

From Gizmodo

Senate Banking Committee after talking to top bankers. Image by Getty Images via @daylife

Financial analysts are growing increasingly uneasy about Bank of America’s current interest rates. One analyst borrowed a term from Las Veas claiming “The loosest rates in banking.” he went on,

“I am not sure they can continue as a viable entity much longer.”

What is causing this concern is the tiny spread between the interest rate charged for credit card transactions starting at 14.5 percent, and what the bank pays for savings accounts, 1/10th of one percent.

“It is insanity, these rates cannot be maintained!”

Quoted one analyst. “To expect an institution to survive on a 14.49 percent spread is folly, no matter how many credit card users default into the more reasonable 29.95 percent bracket.”

Not all was doom and gloom, many analysts were pleased with BofA’s new one percent rewards program on their credit cards. and a bank spokesman was quoted, “Between charging customers a fee to move their own money to cover overdrafts, and this new program which can generate $13.00 in interest for ever dollar we pay out in “rewards,” we feel we are in a very good position to continue our executive bonus program. Our customers can count on Bank of America to be there for Wall Street.”

When asked about the disconnect between paying people a dollar for spending $100, versus only paying 10 cents for saving $100 dollars. A bank spokesperson said, “I’m not sure I understand your question.”

Airlines are rushing to implement their newest “revenue enhancement,” a $45.00 Volcano Flight Interruption Fee.

A spokesman claimed, “We see this as a benefit for our travelers. This way only the passengers who wish to continue their trip will have to pay for it. Some travelers may decide to seek alternate transportation to their destination and they will not be charged this fee. Of course, they will incur a $50.00 Seeking Alternate Transportation Fee, and the $20.00 vacant seat fee.”

When asked what an airline ticket actually purchased, the spokes person replied, “People are under the mistaken impression they are buying transportation, but there is no way we can actually get them anywhere for what we charge, so essentially the price of a ticket buys passengers the right to be charged for all the things it takes to actually run an airline.”

“And how is this working out for you?” we asked.

“I am proud to report, that by implementing these fees and with the concessions we have received from the pilots, mechanics, and flight attendants unions, we were able to keep our executive compensation right where it needs to be.”

More later.

Courtesy of Apollo Ideas

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Courtesy of Apollo Ideas

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