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Georgian granny disconnects Armenian internet

Beware copper-scavenging septuagenarians

By Lester Haines •

I know she's not Nemo

I recently signed up for Netflix.

As I was surveying the vast assortment of movies available to me for instant streaming…

I searched for Finding Nemo and sure enough I found it (Netflix has everything) But it was only available on DVD. Ever resourceful, Netflix offered me some alternatives…

Ponyo

Ponyo

“This Japanese anime feature from famed filmmaker Hayao Miyazaki follows the adventures of a 5-year-old boy, Sosuke, and his burgeoning friendship with Ponyo, a goldfish princess who desperately wants to become human.”

At least it’s about a fish… sort of.

Stuart Little 3 – Call of the Wild

Stuart Little 3 - Call of the Wild

With school out for the summer, the Littles are vacationing in a cabin by the lake, and Stuart is so excited he could burst! But when Snowbell the cat is captured by a mean-spirited creature known simply as the Beast, it’s up to Stuart and a skunk named Reeko to rescue him and a few other friends.

A mouse, hmmm, Netflix is reaching here. But it is a kids’ movie.

And it’s here that Netflix goes off on a tangent…

100 Saltwater Fishing Mistakes

The next two movies:

100 Saltwater Fishing Mistakes & How to Avoid Them

Sometimes, doing things correctly is only a matter of knowing what not to do. And when it comes to saltwater fishing, learning from your mistakes isn’t always the safest method.

and

Offshore Fishing: Deep Dwellers

Offshore Fishing

You can easily become a pro at offshore fishing — or at least look like a pro — with help from this 40-minute instructional release that offers plenty of insider tips, innovative methods and tricky techniques to dig up grouper, snapper and triggerfish.

Does anyone else find it a little disconcerting that two films on fishing would be offered as substitutes for a children’s cartoon about fish?

Maybe I’m just being too sensitive.

Maybe clownfish are good eatin’

Umm umm umm

"Don't be alarmed, I'm a dogter"

And all this time we just thought they were looking for love.

From the BBC.

A Funny Writer Too!

This just in from Jasmine Hall: Over at OnlineClasses.org she has finished an article that sets out to do the impossible, identify the fifteen funniest writers of all time. Although the list does not include me, it could spark some discussion.You can find it here.

Oh! And in case we don’t see each other before next month, Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Jolly Kwanzaa, Happy Channukah, Feliz Navidad, or (insert your sentiment here) and May 2011 be filled with goodness, kindness and mercy for you and yours!

Airlines are rushing to implement their newest “revenue enhancement,” a $45.00 Volcano Flight Interruption Fee.

A spokesman claimed, “We see this as a benefit for our travelers. This way only the passengers who wish to continue their trip will have to pay for it. Some travelers may decide to seek alternate transportation to their destination and they will not be charged this fee. Of course, they will incur a $50.00 Seeking Alternate Transportation Fee, and the $20.00 vacant seat fee.”

When asked what an airline ticket actually purchased, the spokes person replied, “People are under the mistaken impression they are buying transportation, but there is no way we can actually get them anywhere for what we charge, so essentially the price of a ticket buys passengers the right to be charged for all the things it takes to actually run an airline.”

“And how is this working out for you?” we asked.

“I am proud to report, that by implementing these fees and with the concessions we have received from the pilots, mechanics, and flight attendants unions, we were able to keep our executive compensation right where it needs to be.”

More later.