In Praise of Armored Clothing

Joe Rocket armored jacket

This is not a tragic tale. In fact I am sure it was pretty amusing to those who witnessed it. Yesterday I dropped my Yamaha Majesty. This is a 427 pound 400cc “Maxi-Scooter.” And “dropping” is euphemism for crashing, although in my case…

I fell over.

Here is the sad, sordid tale.

I pulled out of a parking lot and turned down a  side street, about a hundred feet farther I needed to make a right turn to head home. If I was going five miles per hour I would be surprised, as I approached the intersection I noticed some loose sand and gravel in the corner. For those unfamiliar with two-wheel physics, loose sand and gravel on asphault has approximately the same characteristics as ice.

So I said to myself, “That’s loose sand and gravel in the corner, I need to be careful.”

Boom!

I was down on my right side.

I was a little surprised by this. Hadn’t I just said to be careful?

I heard my engine sputter to a stop, then I dragged myself up, righted the Majesty, and after a few tries got it restarted and went on my way. My right shoulder hurt, my neck hurt, I skinned my right knee through my jeans, my upper right rib cage hurt, and my right ankle was sore.

I have been known, when it is warm to ride in a Hawaiian shirt, shorts, flip-flops and no helmet. But yesterday I had jeans, my Joe Rocket armored jacket and full face helmet on. Thank you, Lord!

Because as sore as I was, and am, I am convinced I would have broken my shoulder without the jacket on. And I don’t even like to think about what my skin would look like, had I been in just shorts and shirt.

So… what’s funny about this?

Several lessons here:

1. Going slow doesn’t always save you.
2. Knowing what’s coming, doesn’t mean you can avoid it.
3. Just because you know what to do, doesn’t mean you’ll have time to do it.
4. Always wear protection.
5. And what doesn’t kill us, makes for a great story.

This has to season awhile before I find the funny, but I will.

In the meantime you could track down the fifty or so vehicles who passed by. I imagine they thought it was hilarious.